I Just Got Engaged! Now What?

“I just got engaged! Now what?” 

First of all, congratulations! This is such a fun time in your life, don’t forget to take some time to soak it all in, celebrate, and really enjoy this season! Being engaged is such a relatively short period of time, and it’s so sweet – but one of the things I’ve seen time and time again is couples getting so focused on planning their wedding that they don’t fully enjoy their engagement. Below I have listed five things you can do during your engagement to help you enjoy your engagement and plan the wedding of your dreams! 

1. Prioritize Wedding-Planning-Free Date Nights

Before I started planning my own wedding, my now-husband told me we had to set aside one night a week to spend together without talking about wedding planning. For the most part, we stuck to that and I really do believe it helped us enjoy being engaged more than we would have if all our time was spent planning. *We were engaged for over a year, so spending quality time together without wedding planning might look different for shorter engagements, but I am confident that it can be done and that it will strengthen your relationship. 

2. Have a Wedding Planning Dream Date

A wedding planning dream date is a really beautiful way to kick off your wedding planning process – having an idea of where you’re going can help guide you along the way. I encourage you to really think about what is important to you on your wedding day. This is a time to sit down with your fiance in a place free from distractions and imagine the wedding of your dreams. Think about the kinds of memories you want to have – and, as a photographer, I encourage you to dream about what you want your wedding photos to look like. You might dream of seeing yourself walking out of city hall, or in a field surrounded by wildflowers, or on the top of a mountain. Whatever your dream is – and there is no dream too big when it comes to your wedding – don’t be afraid to make it happen!

3. Choose the Perfect Wedding Vendors

The vendors you choose can make or break your wedding. I always recommend that you spend plenty of time researching lots of different vendors before making any decisions. Browse their social media profiles, their websites, and read reviews. If you’d like to see the exact process I used to find vendors for my own wedding (and still use to find vendors for my recommended vendors list, styled shoots, etc.), check out my blog post from a few weeks ago, “How to Choose Elopement Vendors”. 

4. Plan Intentionally

I encourage you to really think about what is important to you on your wedding day. Think about the kinds of memories you want to have. Be intentional during the planning process to prioritize your experience over traditions (if you do choose to include certain traditions on your wedding day, make sure you’re doing so because they actually mean something to you). A question that I want you to ask yourself multiple times throughout your planning process – before you reach out to every vendor and before you make each major purchase (and it requires you to be completely honest with yourself) – “Am I just doing it because it makes me feel nostalgic, or does it actually mean something to me?” There are a lot of things about weddings that feel nostalgic – from your childhood, from every movie you’ve ever seen, from stories that your parents or grandparents told you – and nostalgia is a good feeling. But it can also sometimes cause you to hang on to things that actually have no meaning to you. As you plan your wedding day, don’t feel pressure to follow anyone else’s traditions. Instead, focus on creating a meaningful experience for you and your partner.

5. Give Yourself Grace & Remember the Big Picture

At the end of the day, the goal of your wedding is not to get featured in a magazine. The goal of your wedding is not to be Pinterest worthy. The goal of your wedding is not to make your friends jealous. The goal of your wedding is that you will be married to the love of your life. Period. Things will go wrong during the planning process and on your wedding day, guaranteed. But when you shift your mindset to remember what is truly important, those things that go wrong won’t even matter. Always, always, always give yourself, your partner, and those who will be surrounding you on your wedding day grace. 

Planning a wedding is a lot of work, but when you’re planning the wedding of your *dreams* you will feel so energized and excited. Take it from someone who almost planned the “wrong” wedding. As I was gathering inspiration for this post, I read a few of my older posts and I wanted to share this excerpt from a blog post I wrote two years ago (click here to read the full post): 

For those of you who have been reading this blog for a while, you may remember that my husband and I got married in none other than the incredibly beautiful Rocky Mountain National Park! It was gorgeous, the weather literally couldn’t have been more perfect, and it was basically the kind of day that brides’ dreams are made of. But here’s something I bet you didn’t know: that day almost didn’t happen.

Now, it’s not what you’re thinking – Keith and I were always going to get married. But when we first got engaged, I got pretty far into the process of planning a wedding in a chapel in Fort Worth, Texas. I was trying to juggle dates and numbers and prices (and my mom’s feelings), and I started to feel very overwhelmed. One day, after a particularly stressful planning session, Keith sat me down (I was crying) and asked me a very important question: “Forget everyone else. If we could get married anywhere, where would you want it to be?”

And the answer came to me so quickly that it shocked me. I must have subconsciously been thinking about it for weeks, because it was right there the moment he asked. 

“In a national park.” 

And he said “OK.” 

I had never heard of anyone getting married in a national park; I wasn’t even sure it was possible. But at least I knew what I wanted. 

Over the next few weeks and months, I still had a lot of planning to do. I still had to juggle dates, numbers, and prices (and my mom’s feelings) – but this time I wasn’t planning something just because I thought it was what I was supposed to be planning – I was planning a day that was about Keith and me, and for Keith and me. And that made all the difference in the world.

My dream for you is that during your engagement you are filled with love for your partner, inspiration for your upcoming wedding, and peace, knowing that you are planning a wedding that is for you and about you. 

*All my blog posts contain a selection of images that I’ve taken. If you are interested in booking a wedding or session with me, I am more than happy to send you a full gallery upon request!

I’m a wife, a dog mom, a foodie, a wanderer, a registered nurse, and a couples/intimate wedding/elopement photographer … and this blog will cover it all! If you enjoyed this post, first of all thank you, and second of all please follow me on Instagram + Facebook to get updates on future blog posts, see sneak peeks of my amazing couples, and so much more! If you have any questions about elopement photography, my journey from nursing to photography, or my time spent as a full-time RVer, drop a comment and I just might write a blog post answering your question (but I definitely will)!

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