As most of you know, at the time I started my photography business, I was working as an emergency department travel nurse. And if you follow me on Instagram you probably also know that I no longer work as a travel nurse. For someone who loves traveling as much as I do, travel nursing seems like it would be the perfect job, right? Well, I absolutely loved getting to travel to different states and experience living there for several months at a time, but constantly working in the busiest, most understaffed emergency departments in the country (hence their need for travel nurses) finally took its toll on my mental health, and in October of 2021 I worked my last shift as a travel nurse. Today’s blog post is all about what my life has looked like the last few years.
At the time I walked away from traveling, I was working in an emergency department in Oklahoma City. Cutting my time as a travel nurse short hadn’t been part of the plan, but my husband and I were fortunate to be able to return to Northwest Arkansas and stay with his parents while we figured out what we were going to do next. Keith was even able to immediately return to the job he had worked at before we left 18 months earlier, which was and still is a huge blessing for us.
We knew we wanted to buy a house, but we couldn’t seem to find one that suited us. I’d owned a home before we got married, but even at the time I knew that was just a “starter home”. Knowing that we would likely live in our next house for longer than just a few years, we wanted to make sure we both loved it. There was also the fact that I took about four weeks off from nursing after the Oklahoma City contract; I wanted to be working again before we applied for a home loan.
Not wanting to work in the emergency department (or even at the bedside), I took a job as a Pre-Anesthesia Testing nurse. I’d never heard of that position before, but basically my job was to call patients on the phone before their elective surgeries and go through a questionnaire with them that would go in their chart. It was a pretty big change to go from working three 12-hour shifts per week to working five 8-hour shifts per week. Also, the job shouldn’t have been hard, but there were a few factors that made it much worse than it should have been. I’m not sure if my mental health got worse or better during that time. It was just a different type of stress than I had been experiencing while working in the emergency department. Nevertheless, I stuck it out for a whole year.
During that year that I worked in PAT, our living situation was … complicated to say the least. Although initially upon our return to Arkansas we had stayed with Keith’s parents, they were preparing to sell their house and build a new one. We were anticipating buying a home within the next few months, so Keith’s sister offered for us to stay with her and our two nieces until that time. It was really fun for us to be living with our nieces, and I couldn’t have been prouder of how gentle Luna was with our youngest niece, who turned one right after we moved in. Around Christmas we finally found a house to buy. Buuuuut it was a new construction and wouldn’t be finished until the end of March. That was okay. We could do anything for three months (ironically, that was the exact same thing I used to tell myself before each travel nursing contract).
Right after Christmas, Keith’s parents’ house sold, and they also moved in with his sister. So now there were seven of us all living in a three bedroom/two bathroom house. I do not recommend it. What kept me sane was the fact that it was only for three months – that and playing with my nieces (and Luna) of course.
Finally, March arrived. We were so excited to soon be living in our very own home for the first time in over two years (yes, the camper was our home, but it was so tiny!). Until, that is, the builders told us that the house wouldn’t be finished until May. They said it must have been a typo on our contract, that the house was never supposed to be finished in March. You know, both March and May start with the letter ‘M’, so it’s an easy mistake to make, right? *Note, I do not think it’s an easy mistake to make.
Even though it was only two more months, I became depressed. It must have been a combination of not getting enough vitamin D through the winter, adjusting to a new job, not feeling like I had enough time to work on what I really wanted to be working on (my photography business) because of a job that I hated, not feeling like I had any sort of control over any part of my life, and then, on top of all of that, the one thing that I felt would drastically change my mood and improve my mental health that I’d been looking forward to for six months got postponed. Looking back, of course, those extra two months we had to wait were not that big of a deal. But at the time, it felt so monumental.
Finally, finally, finally our house was ready. And it was such a relief to move into our own home and have our things that had been in storage since before I started travel nursing. Luna fell in love with the yard, and Keith and I fell in love with the house (the good news is that we still love it!).
Once the excitement (and stress) of moving into our new house wore off, I finally started to heal from the burnout that I had felt while working in the emergency department. But there was still a major stressor in my life that I had the power to change. When I first quit travel nursing and we moved back to Northwest Arkansas, I firmly believed that I would never work in the emergency department again (I laugh about that now). Wellll … after a year of working at a job that I hated with a schedule that I hated – and listen, I tried so hard to like that job! – I decided to make a change.
One of the best things about nursing is that there are, at all times, jobs available. Almost anywhere, for any position, and for any shift. At that point, I still did not really want to work in the emergency department, but I decided I would rather work there than work anywhere else. It was something familiar that wouldn’t have a huge learning curve. And, lo and behold, I found a job opening that seemed perfect for me. It was a part time day shift position at a standalone emergency department. I’d done a travel contract at a standalone ER in Tacoma, Washington, so I was somewhat familiar with what it would be like to work there.
When I went from working five days a week to only working two days a week, I literally felt like a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I had time to do all the things I hadn’t had the energy to do for the last year. I was able to have slow mornings at home, sipping on tea and snuggling with Luna. I was able to cook a hot meal for lunch and take my time eating it. I was able to spend time with friends and do activities and relax in the evenings. I was able to work on my photography business more. And, as the months went on, I stopped feeling anxious before every single shift. I stopped feeling like I would be absolutely miserable if I had to be a nurse for the rest of my life.
Part of the reason for this change (and the reason why I was able to go from working full time to part time) was the fact that Keith got a promotion at work. And part of it is the fact that I finally found a non-toxic working environment (I honestly didn’t think they existed). Sure, there are stressful and frustrating days, but the teamwork there is so good that I never feel as though I’m facing everything alone.
There have been a lot of ups and downs over the last two years. There are some things I would change if I could. But mostly, I’m so proud of the life we’re building and the happiness and peace we’ve created here. If you’re still reading, thank you. It’s fairly easy to write about the good times in my life, but it’s pretty intimidating to write about the times when I was stressed, anxious, burnt out, and not the best version of myself. But having readers like you makes it all worth it.
*All my blog posts contain a selection of images that I’ve taken. This blog post contains images that I took myself for personal use and enjoyment and are not intended to be used for marketing purposes. Most of them were taken on a cell phone, and all of them are unedited. If you are interested in viewing some galleries of my couples, intimate wedding, and elopement photography, click here. If you’re interested in booking a wedding or session with me, I am more than happy to send you a full gallery upon request!
I’m a wife, a dog mom, a foodie, a wanderer, a registered nurse, and a couples/intimate wedding/elopement photographer … and this blog will cover it all! If you enjoyed this post, first of all thank you, and second of all please follow me on Instagram + Facebook and sign up for my monthly newsletter to get exclusive wedding planning advice and access to all of my new (and old) freebies! If you have any questions about elopement photography, my journey from nursing to photography, or my time spent as a full-time RVer, drop a comment and I just might write a blog post answering your question (but I definitely will)!
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