The content in this blog post first appeared in my monthly newsletter in September of 2023. Sign up here for first access to more content like this!
Happy September! Fall (aka my favorite season) is in the air, and I couldn’t be happier. There is almost nothing I love more than an Autumn elopement, and today I am coming at you with allll the tips on how to create a unique experience for yourself on your wedding or elopement day – and the best part is that you can take the tips that feel right for you and your wedding and leave the rest. No matter what kind of wedding you’re planning, there’s nothing more special than planning something unexpected or out of the ordinary for yourself and your partner on your wedding day that you will be able to look back on for years to come!
It starts with intentional planning.
The first tip I have for you today is a question that I want you to ask yourself multiple times throughout your planning process – before you reach out to every vendor and before you make each major purchase. It requires you to be completely honest with yourself.
“Am I just doing it because it makes me feel nostalgic, or does it actually mean something to me?”
There are a lot of things about weddings that feel nostalgic – from your childhood, from every movie you’ve ever seen, from stories that your parents or grandparents told you – and nostalgia is a good feeling. But it can also sometimes cause you to hang on to things that actually have no meaning to you. So on your wedding day, don’t feel pressure to follow anyone else’s traditions. Instead, focus on creating a meaningful experience for you and your partner.
3 outdated wedding traditions and what you can do instead to create a meaningful experience:
- Spending $$$$ on a wedding dress. Granted, this is a fairly modern tradition, but a tradition nonetheless. Something much more meaningful would be to have your mother’s or grandmother’s wedding dress tailored to fit you and your style. Another option would be using a vintage wedding dress (more on this later).
- Not seeing each other before the ceremony. Okay, I can kinda understand not wanting your partner to see you until you’re *ceremony ready* – your hair and makeup are done, your fancy wedding clothes are on, everything’s perfect. But on a wedding day, waiting until the ceremony to see each other can really cut down on the time you spend together, and that makes me really sad. It can also be very impractical, logistically speaking. Just consider how special it would be to get ready together on the morning of your elopement. Imagine him helping you with all the buttons on your dress. Imagine her helping you with your cufflinks and boutonniere. If you’re really committed to this concept, doing a first look is a great option (if you’re interested in reading my opinions on first looks, check out this blog post I wrote a few weeks ago).
- Non-personalized wedding vows. Whether you choose to say personalized vows to each other during your ceremony, say them to each other in private, or write them to each other in letters that you read on the morning of your wedding, during your ceremony, or on your wedding night, personalizing your wedding vows is a really meaningful way to express your feelings to your partner on your wedding day.
My favorite thing about photographing weddings is seeing all the things my couples have done to create a meaningful day together. And there’s no right or wrong way to do anything – whatever is important and special to you should be included in your wedding day.
“Location is everything” doesn’t just apply to real estate.
Tip #2 is to get married wherever and whenever you want. Weddings are about creating an experience centered around you and your partner. Everything else is just details. If getting married in a church or at a huge wedding venue with manicured lawns doesn’t speak to you, there are so many other cool places you can get married!
Three amazing non-traditional wedding locations:
- A library. Whether you’re wanting a modern or vintage setting for your wedding, I bet you can find a library that fits your style.
- A vacation rental. From cozy mountain a-frame cabins to lakeside bungalows, you can truly find just about any style or setting you want for your elopement.
- A glass chapel. If you’ve never been to any of the three gorgeous glass chapels here in Arkansas, you really should check them out! Located in Bella Vista, Eureka Springs, and Hot Springs, each one is unique – but all of them are *stunning*. Read more about them (and other amazing places to get married in Arkansas) in my last blog post.
Wear thrifted or vintage wedding attire.
If you’ve been around here for any amount of time, you probably know I love thrifting – whether it’s for my house or my closet. One of my most favorite ways to create a meaningful experience on your wedding day is to wear second hand attire – whether it’s handed down from someone you know or thrifted. One of the reasons this is my favorite tip is because it’s meaningful for more than one reason; it’s a beautiful way to honor the bride or groom who wore those clothes before you, and also thrifting your elopement attire is 100% more sustainable than buying new.
To do a first look or not to do a first look, this is the question.
Because every single wedding day is so unique, it’s kinda hard to give a tip on whether or not you should have a first look with your partner. All I can say is, if you’re planning your wedding day around the tradition that the couple shouldn’t see each other before the ceremony, go back and read the first tip in this email. Instead, this tip is to do a first look with either your parents, your grandparents, your siblings, your best friends … whoever. This is a great way to help your loved ones feel included and special on your wedding day.
Three ways to make the first look with your loved ones even more special:
- Arrange for your photographer to capture the moment.
- Write them a letter.
- Give them a small gift.
For your loved ones who are not there …
There are several reasons why your loved ones may not be at your wedding. Maybe you’re having a destination wedding and not everyone can afford to go, maybe some of your loved ones have health restrictions, maybe you’re eloping … the possibilities are endless. Finding ways to include them even if they aren’t present at your ceremony can be really special for you and for them.
Here are three ways to include your loved ones who won’t be at your wedding:
- Ask them to write a letter to you and your partner to read on your wedding day.
- Plan celebrations for them to attend, either before or after your wedding (bridal shower, bach parties, reception, etc.).
- Have them record a video toast that you can watch on your wedding day.
Final thoughts …
However, whenever, and wherever you choose to get married, I know that it will be amazing (P.S. hire me to photograph it because I love that I get to capture the moments you will treasure and look back on for years to come!). I hope this email has given you some ideas on how you can create a meaningful experience for yourself and your partner on your wedding day.
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*All my blog posts contain a selection of images that I’ve taken. If you are interested in booking a wedding or session with me, I am more than happy to send you a full gallery upon request!
I’m a wife, a dog mom, a foodie, a wanderer, a registered nurse, and a couples/intimate wedding/elopement photographer … and this blog will cover it all! If you enjoyed this post, first of all thank you, and second of all please follow me on Instagram + Facebook and sign up for my monthly newsletter to get exclusive wedding planning advice and access to all of my new (and old) freebies! If you have any questions about elopement photography, my journey from nursing to photography, or my time spent as a full-time RVer, drop a comment and I just might write a blog post answering your question (but I definitely will)!
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